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Wednesday 13 October 2010

No silly banters !




M
y autorickshaw rides in Mangalore, most of the time, have been an enlightening experience. I get into the three-wheeler, only to be laden with some serious thoughts as I get down.  Those have never been boring jaunts as there would be an analysis of the problems at the grass roots. Many areas which were hitherto unknown to me were uncovered ! 


     One gaping pothole is enough to make the drivers’ tongue wag. Luckily (?) potholes lay all your way in Mangalore. If you show a little interest in their diatribe, they continue until you alight. Their ire, as always, is against the government as to how the government mulls over repairing the road after collecting hefty taxes. If it is pouring cats and dogs, a talk on the downpour, like how the rainy days were before and now how the city has gone to the dogs wanting in basic requirements, awaits you, especially by senior autowaalas.


     They would spill the beans about the dignitaries in the city, whom you have been adoring all these years. You never feel like interrupting when the gossip mill is busy churning out spicy news for you.


     Once, when I was paying the autowaala, he said “I give medicines for joint pain”. Hearing this when I looked at him in disbelief, he told me “I have cured about 2,979 persons,” if I am remembering the figures correctly. If that was not enough, the enterprising driver added: “I prepare pickles. If you want I have them right now priced at Rs 30 per bottle.” I, however, did not buy was a different matter.


     Some are most willing to share their family affairs. I was pleasantly surprised to learn from an old auto driver that his postgraduate daughter has settled in the US of America following her marriage and his son studying law. Some are eagerly ready to tell you about the day’s collection and how they struggle to make ends meet with their meager income. The young ambitious autowaalas forever are grumbling about the fares, while the old is content with the “fair” fare. That shows the shift in the priorities of the two generations.


     Once my sis-in-law and I had been to the second show of a Big B-starrer movie. When we were discussing about the movie in the auto, our movie buff driver joined us quite vocally. Then came a talk on yester-year movies and actors.


     However, that does not mean I have never met rude autowaalas. I have also seen drivers who vanish without giving change or extort unreasonable fare on long routes. Sometimes they are simply overtly rude. But such bitter incidents are minimal when compared to the “feel-good” episodes.


     Luckily, unlike in other big cities, Mangalore doesn’t have much alternate routes for the driver to take the passenger “for a ride.” The bumpy roads apart, the autowaalas, most of the time make our jaunt a smooth ride. Let their breed flourish. 




                     


Sunday 19 September 2010

Let us not burden our parents further



O
ur parents, who slog to bring us up, heave a sigh of relief, the moment they see us well settled. They want to lead a relaxed life thenceforth. But they never know that the days they looked forward to are short-lived.

     The birds that fly off the nest for greener pastures, return with their offsprings. As the child does not seem to adjust to the caretaker or crèche atmosphere, “the bundle of joy” is inadvertently transferred to grandparents.

     The working youngsters do not realize or sometimes ignore the fact that the parents are ageing. With their energy beginning to ebb, the old people find it very difficult to look after the tiny brats full time.

Nani turns nanny

     I have seen many aged parents who just could not turn down the request/requirement of their working children. In the process the old parents are again pushed back to the daily grind. The hassle-free life they dreamt of appears to be nothing but a mirage.

     Though, having grandparents in a family is a welcome thought, they should not be reduced to the role of a babysitter. The naani should not become a nanny. There should at least be a caretaker for the child, supervised by grandparents.

     Despite the fear of sounding a little regressive in my thought, I sincerely feel that in such circumstances, either of the parents should take a sabbatical from their demanding job or look for a part time/work-from-home proposition.

      Let us repay our beloved parents by providing a life that is due to them in the dusk of their life.  Let them greet us with a congenial smile when we return home but not with a haggard look. 

(Published in Mumbai edition of DNA on Sept 16, 2010)




Friday 17 September 2010

For a change: Ravan has the last laugh


R
ecently I watched a Hindi play Ravanleela at Matunga in Mumbai.  Yatri presented the play directed by Om Katare. Dr Kusum Kumar has written the play.

     This is about Ramleela, performed by a group of countryside artistes at a rural area. The Ramleela goes wrong in whatever way it could, ultimately Ravan gaining an upper hand over Ram. Hence it is Ravanleela. And the escapades in the process leave you in splits.   

     The play that has the plot of Ramleela, begins with the story of Ravan. The crowd is agitated over the delay in the commencement of Ramleela.  The manager has to bore the brunt of their angst as he has to manage with a bunch of untrained and unenthusiastic actors put together for the annual ritual called Ramleela.  For the rustic actors Ramleela is just like any other ritual more than performance.

      Lack of coordination between the Ramleela actors and the background score and the quirky behaviour of the artistes evoke peels of laughter.  Their professional equations at times turn personal on and off stage.

      Persuading the now on now off Kartar Singh to act out Ravan is indeed a tough task for the manager and the other actors. Weighed down by a personal peeve of a leaking roof of his home, he asks for a hike in remuneration, which, the manager feels unreasonable.

     Ultimately Ravan turns to be a “show stopper” by refusing to die at the end unless he was paid more. The audience simmers with anger.  Once the helpless manager gives in to his demand, Ravan not even waits for Ram’s arrow, he stabs himself with his sword.

      But for Vibheeshan, all the cast was good.  Vibheeshan lacked spontaneity.  Audience just loved Ravan, not because he was Ravan, but he was Kartar Singh. Kartar Singh’s easy transformation from a much-worried amateur artiste to a hilarious Ravan within no time is commendable.
       Taking a dig at the hype over culture, a worried Kartar says no culture is superior to the culture of earning one’s daily bread.  Nothing precedes the culture of two square meals a day.  That draws home the point.


Tuesday 8 June 2010

A bit of soul-searching



T
he recent spate of suicides among students and youngsters has set the alarm bell ringing.  The incidents look like a chain reaction, one case triggering another. A disturbing trend that has made us sit up and take notice.

     What is the reason behind it? Have our youngsters become so fragile? Have they lost confidence in them?  Are there any faults with the parents in bringing up the children? Let us do a bit of soul-searching.

Children should be reassured

     Mainly the children should not be trapped in the vicious circle of parental/peer pressure, competition, relationships and materialistic allure. The children should be reassured constantly. They should be told about the preciousness of life and the long journey that lay ahead. 

     Death should not be the means to vent one’s frustration. But the frustration/disappointment, if any, should give way to a new beginning. One should learn to move on in life. Overcoming the sudden impulse of taking one’s own life itself is a triumph.

     Instead of training the students for only a few educational goals in life, they should be made aware of the myriad other opportunities available to fall back upon in case they fail to reach it.

Let children live their dreams

     Parents should not induce a sense of guilt among their children for not realizing their (parents’) dreams for their children. The guilt-ridden fear of falling from the grace of parents, in fact, constantly chases them.  Realizing the children’s potential, they should be encouraged to study with realistic goals.

     Finally parents should learn to accept their children as they are.  This will pave the way for the children to accept themselves as they are without any complex.



Sunday 6 June 2010

Travails of a train travel

I
 was a bit conceited at my feat of securing tickets to travel to Mumbai from Udupi, that too at short notice.  This when people were making many attempts in vain to get a ticket in the peak season of May –June.

     Though the city of dreams is well-connected to Mangalore through road, rail and air, travelling by train is the most preferred mode of journey.  

     But my pride was like a bubble in the water. It did not last long.  My journey turned out to be rather a misadventure.   After trying unsuccessfully to book tickets from Udupi to Mumbai through the net, I had to approach an agent. He assured me that somehow he would pack me off to Mumbai.   I was not sure whether I would get tickets and which class we would be travelling by.

     In his office, he handed me a photocopy of the ticket booked for five persons. My name was supposed to be Nalini and my 11-year-old daughter was 18-year-old Ravi, and for my son there wasn’t any ticket. But he extracted almost full fare of the five tickets.

     His explanation was that he had to pay to those certain Nalini, Ravi, Shankar, Geetha …  to buy tickets from them. Though I was not so naïve to believe his story, I was obliged to keep my mouth shut, as I had “begged” him for tickets. And this beggar was fleeced royally.  All the tickets were booked for adults.  Not even a single ticket was booked in the name of a child or a senior citizen. The railways gained! 

      For the original copy of the ticket I was told to phone a person.  Mind you, all this was happening just half-an-hour before the arrival of the train. I was anxious a bit. First thing I did was making my children and myself comfortable on the platform and called the number given to me.

     My heart skipped a beat, when the person at the other end told me that he was in Bangalore. Following my explanation he said, “I have never been to that place.”  I hung up, though he wished to continue the conversation trying to find a solution for my problem.

      Again I called the agent asking for the number.  I got the number with the digits at their right places. Somehow I could meet the said person who was to give us the original ticket and the other three passengers, a couple and a student, all memorising their newfound identities.

     So much for the mafia.  You have to book the ticket months in advance if you are doing so online. But if you approach an agent even at the eleventh hour, you will get a ticket. But the price for doing so is, twice the actual fare or sometimes three times!  Make hay while the sun shines. 

     Many a time, my tickets were confirmed only on the morning of my journey that too at the last minute. Till then the agents wait for the gullible passengers. The commissioning of the Konkan railway about two decades back was expected to free the people from the clutches of  bus mafia,  but , alas,  now they are being  fleeced by  another tribe.

     Our second class compartment reminded me of Shashi Tharoor’s “cattle class”. The noisy compartment was brimming with people of all sorts.  The people returning after spending a long vacation with their nearests and dearests. The people who have attended the annual family poojas.  Those who attended weddings of their nephews, nieces and other relatives. You got to see the haggard faces of the men caught between the traditional matriarchal responsibilities and a family called theirs. 

     Poverty cutting short their dream for education,  these men who migrated to Mumbai, have seen to it that their siblings and nephews are taken care of and their nieces well settled after paying hefty dowries. True, Mumbai is the one-stop-solution for all their financial problems. Mumbai did not belie the dreams of these enterprising people.

      Sacks of coconut were stacked under the seats.  These very people who spend a fortune during their visit, take back a few coconuts worth a couple of hundred bucks. So much for their sentiment.  The smell of jackfruit wafted through the compartment. Perhaps the luggage outweighed the passengers.  A stark contrast to the journey etiquette. And there were people accommodating themselves near the toilet. There were people begging the TTE for a berth and some even trying to bribe him.

     When the TTE came, I sent my children to another end of the compartment. Fortunately, he was not insisting to see the passenger. Most of the children eligible for ticket in my compartment, I felt, were, like my son, ticketless.  Then it struck to me that the TTEs are hand in glove with the agents in their misdeeds.  That was why the agent was confident when I repeatedly asked him whether I would have any problem.

     My son and I were lying together in a single berth.   People slept on the floor.   When I woke up in the night, I could see a person staring at me sitting on the floor.  He looked decent but was made to travel in that manner for want of ticket. Even then, startled in the middle of the night, I could not help but checking my neck once. 

      The early morning ensued a clamour to alight.  A large family hurriedly alighted in Panvel. Their luggage was like a mound.  When I reached my destination, it was drizzling.  I was relieved to see my husband waiting for us.  




Monday 15 March 2010

Golden age, just a mirage

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(The article was published in Udayavani on 11.03.2010)



Saturday 9 January 2010

Bedtime Stories



A


re you one of the lucky few who have grown up with a daily dose of bedtime stories? Wasn’t the experience refreshing? Wasn’t it rewarding? You might have eagerly waited for the bedtime each day. Well, such is the charm of the bedtime stories. 


     Imaginations run riot with these stories. Children try to draw a mental picture of the stories as colourful as possible. Have the tales ever become stale? No.  The stories would grow more interesting with many more twists with each narration. Different listeners visualize the same story in different ways. Children pestering whoever stayed overnight for a story was a common scene.

     Children learn values and morals through these mythological or folk stories. Such stories sow the seeds of the skills like reasoning, logical thinking and sequencing in the young minds.  Moreover, a strong bond and affection was developed between the listener and the narrator.

     The young children would be with the grandmother until the mother finished household chores. Children sleeping in the lap of the grandparents would fall into a deep slumber with contentment, awe, shock and what not depending upon the story!  Don’t you remember fantacising about the characters?

     Unfortunately, nowadays such a tradition is on the wane. In the nuclear families parents are engrossed in watching television. Even the children do not lag behind. If both the parents are employed, they would naturally be waiting to hit the sack.

     Anyway that does not mean that today’s children do not know stories. They may be knowing better stories, thanks to television and CDs. To make up for their absence, the working parents are ready to buy any number of expensive gadgets. But the most needed personal touch is lost. The readymade visuals do not give any scope for imagination. Nothing can match the bedtime stories told with fond caress or cuddle.

      On the other hand, not all have forgotten this age-old practice. There are some indulgent parents despite hard pressed against time. The advent of materialism and technology notwithstanding, there are certain households that religiously follow the tradition. Let the  kind be on the rise.